And no I don't mean Beyonce's happy booty shaking song..
It's a bad case of Deja Vu.
I've been feeling like this for a while..but I think I've just been in denial. I'm pretty sure it's not just deja vu..it's a repeat..a cycle of never ending frustration..but I know I don't want to face it because breaking the cycle would mean breaking so much more that I've stuck to for so long..
Oh the frustration.....
On another note..my mom has been nagging about buying office clothes ever since I finished uni..but now I really do think I have to start my collection of fashionable work clothes..but I'm so indecisive about shopping because of money dilemmas..
I need to take it one moment at a time..seriously..before I burn to ashes from my own fiery frustration..
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Trapped
I'm stuck..
In this country..
In my own house..
In my own mind..
In my own heart..
I feel stupid.
In this country..
In my own house..
In my own mind..
In my own heart..
I feel stupid.
Thursday, July 1, 2010
New List
Okay..I've thought about my list..so let's try again. Things I want to or am at least interested in learning (but takes some money), in no specific order:
1. Japanese
2. Pilates (the one with the machines not just the one with the mat type)
3. Mandarin
4. Sewing (as in with the machine to make clothes or bags, stuff like that)
5. Accounting (even though I've heard 'horror' stories about the hard long hours accountants put in..)
6. Photoshop ( so I can make cool pictures..haha..)
7. Pole dancing (please..no perverted thoughts..it's hard..I've tried it a few times..the bruises are not sexy..but it's fun nonetheless)
8. Swimming (because after the few absent years of not dancing ballet, exercise hurts my knees often..)
9. Playing the piano with just chords/by ear (I still rely on notes..and even then I'm not that great from so long of not playing much)
10. Cooking (I love watching the food channel..though actually following is another issue..)
11. Make-up and hairstyling (because it comes in handy when wanting to look fab..)
Hmm..that's all I can come up with for now..another list that I have in mind has to do with changing my look..or trying something different..it's a short list..so you dont have to read more lists after this..in this post anyway..
1. Red lipstick (I really want to try wearing that red lipstick look that will make feel just slightly glamorous and mature..hah..)
2. Hair perm (My hair is already quite curly already..but I want a more uniform curly look..more of big soft curls..)
3. Eyebrow wax/threading (I know ppl that did the wax..I'm really so tempted coz I just tweeze..but it's going to be painful.........)
4. Manicure/Pedicure (I've never tried..my nails are not so pretty coz I used to bite them so I just keep them short..plus I tend to scratch myself when they become just a little bit longer)
5. Full body massage (I get quite ticklish so not sure if this will ever come true..but who knows?)
Yes..that's all for now.. :)
Love and Hugs
1. Japanese
2. Pilates (the one with the machines not just the one with the mat type)
3. Mandarin
4. Sewing (as in with the machine to make clothes or bags, stuff like that)
5. Accounting (even though I've heard 'horror' stories about the hard long hours accountants put in..)
6. Photoshop ( so I can make cool pictures..haha..)
7. Pole dancing (please..no perverted thoughts..it's hard..I've tried it a few times..the bruises are not sexy..but it's fun nonetheless)
8. Swimming (because after the few absent years of not dancing ballet, exercise hurts my knees often..)
9. Playing the piano with just chords/by ear (I still rely on notes..and even then I'm not that great from so long of not playing much)
10. Cooking (I love watching the food channel..though actually following is another issue..)
11. Make-up and hairstyling (because it comes in handy when wanting to look fab..)
Hmm..that's all I can come up with for now..another list that I have in mind has to do with changing my look..or trying something different..it's a short list..so you dont have to read more lists after this..in this post anyway..
1. Red lipstick (I really want to try wearing that red lipstick look that will make feel just slightly glamorous and mature..hah..)
2. Hair perm (My hair is already quite curly already..but I want a more uniform curly look..more of big soft curls..)
3. Eyebrow wax/threading (I know ppl that did the wax..I'm really so tempted coz I just tweeze..but it's going to be painful.........)
4. Manicure/Pedicure (I've never tried..my nails are not so pretty coz I used to bite them so I just keep them short..plus I tend to scratch myself when they become just a little bit longer)
5. Full body massage (I get quite ticklish so not sure if this will ever come true..but who knows?)
Yes..that's all for now.. :)
Love and Hugs
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